A/n. Hello, guys~ So, as some of you probably know, AKBlasphemy48 got shut down. I just wanted to say thank you to Max for giving us opportunity to enjoy the freedom of posting and reading a fanfiction of no boundaries, for as long as it lasted.
Now, since this is something my fans probably love the most out of everything I posted there (aside from A.L.I.V.E. fanfic, which you can find on AKB Fanfics on JPH!P forum), I am re-posting this fanfic of mine, called My Kuchi Utsushi Butler, or MKUB for short. Hope you enjoy, re-enjoy and be patient while I work on the next update (which is Chapter 6 and a SMUT *grins*)
WARNING. Contains genderbender, smut, might contain strong language.
Rena was having a hard time inside the memory lane while dreaming, and her body just couldn’t keep still. If she knew about her shuffling she probably would feel sorry for Jun, who before couldn’t sleep because of his memories, and now because of this beautiful ohimesama tossing and turning too. The raven haired girl hugged Jun tighter while still deep in her sleep and as if knowing he returned her hug with his firm embrace, Rena stopped squirming as much.
FLASHBACK, 5 years ago
Being still in a recovery state and in a deep sleep as well, it didn’t mean that the girl had no recollection of what happened before she fell to it. Since the day she was born Matsui Rena was a spoiled pretty princess who everyone loved and adored. Despite not being able to feel pain due to her mother having difficulties giving birth, the white porcelain skin and long raven hair owner had quite a joyful life. Yes, maybe her nannies changed too much over the years, but it was only because they never managed to spoil her in a correct way. It all changed one day when she was thirteen years old. Her parents employed yet another nanny and day by day they were more and more impressed with her abilities to tend to the spoiled princess. On the other hand, Rena liked this nanny the least out of them all. The nanny was not bad, maybe even the best out of all she had in her not so long life, however… Despite being young, the Matsui girl just had quite a keen sense and she just had a hunch the nanny was somehow too good… Too good to be true and thus she was very well aware of the too sweet behavior that the nanny possessed. Of course, over the time she got used to the nanny’s well polished nature and had forgotten about her worries from way before.
She had no clue that her premonition was true and that one day Rena will regret trusting the sweet nanny. The girl could just so well remember being out in the park, where Kasai-nanny took her on a bright summer day. Rena was fourteen and usually all kids of her age would be more curious about make-up, books or music, hanging out with friends and even dating. However, young Matsui was a spoiled princess who had no friends and thus she enjoyed being alone and playing with her dolls. At that fated moment she was taking a bite of the ever so delicious spicy cracker and waiting for her doll to reply to her random question, when suddenly a huge man’s hand stuffed the whole bunch of those crackers in her tiny mouth and then gagged her with some smelly clothing. She couldn’t remember anything else afterwards, but in her now slowly-returning-to-active mind the image of nanny grinning at her face and then kissing one of the men was becoming very clear. Rena wanted to get up and go find them, especially that sly Kasai Tomomi, and then kill them all with her own hands. It seemed as if the more awake the girl was becoming, the more insane mentally she was turning.
One day she slowly opened her eyes and found herself in a huge comfortable bed with soft mattress. She wanted to lift her head from the pillow and look around the room she was in when a man walked into the room, surprising her completely. Her eyes probably shot wide open as the male stared at her with an eyebrow raised and had a questioning look on his face. At first Rena wanted to scream and shout but was unable to do so for two reasons. One was that her body was too weak and her throat was too dry. Another was the memories of a gentle caring voice that she heard while being in this deep sleep. Rena looked at him with pleading eyes and then she heard him speak in a very gentle and relaxing voice. She realized it was the same voice she kept on hearing all the time so decided he was her savior. He had to be. He must have found her all used by those men and tossed away somewhere in the woods. He must have brought her to his place and taken care of her. Unless why would she be in this huge bed with soft mattress and the tray full of deliciously smelling food in front of her?
As days went by and the girl was slowly recovering, she heard from Jun some parts from what was happening while she was out of it. Since she had recollection of her memories before the kidnapping, Rena somehow realized he was omitting things he thought she might find too hard to deal with. The princess understood his point of view, however, she was tougher than he thought. Trying not to show her inner thoughts and revealing over the curious part, she kept on pressuring Jun to tell her all the details he missed out. In the end the man gave in and told her all of it, leaving only the most gruesome details out. All that time the girl kept on clenching her fists tighter and tighter until the story time was over. Was it okay that he noticed her being tensed and hugged her? Was it okay for her to feel at peace while in his arms? It felt as if all what happened was a dream for those few comfortable silence minutes while in Jun’s embrace. Rena didn’t know what was right or wrong, and she didn’t really care. The hug was just what she needed.
Despite all Jun’s efforts Rena’s mental state was not getting better, on the contrary, day after day she kept on remembering the tiniest details of her kidnapping moments. She could just feel the taste of spicy crackers in her mouth, she could feel it live and thrive within her body, resonating as a venomous need of revenge. The girl found gaps in Jun’s story the more she thought about it. She was sure the man missed out on those details himself and he was unaware of what she discovered while pondering day after day. Rena just knew there had to be some alive bastards left, judging from what he told her of his revenge and her rescue. There had to be some way to find them and destroy them, and she knew she had to be the one to do so. The girl just didn’t realize her mind was going more and more crazy and that she slowly has been losing her inner self to the vengeful insanity. The plan started brewing in her head and Rena just had to wait for the perfect timing to make it work. To think she was a fourteen year old…
It so happened that Jun was unable to notice Rena’s changes because she was good at hiding it all under innocent demeanor. One could say it was thanks to Kasai-nanny that the girl knew how to manipulate someone by outer appearance while having different ideas inside and hidden. So when one time Rena ever so innocently asked him to bring her some spicy crackers, he didn’t think she had any ulterior motives but to eat her most favorite food ever. The princess has her recovery process over, except she still stayed in bed, making sure to add few days of additional recovery just in case. Since the day she was able to speak Rena kept on saying to Jun that she had no recollection nor of her kidnapping, neither of anything up to the point where she woke up. The man believed her and, finding out she wanted to feel the taste of her childhood snack, followed her wish, not knowing that this simple task would bring hell of immense proportion out to the very daylight. He got a pack while on his way back from the caretaker’s job and gave it to her once back home while smiling, to which Rena replied with a smile too. Even so, deep in her heart she felt her plan finally coming to fruition. She just needed to taste one of them and see if she gets any recollection of the kidnappers faces.
Be that as it may, the girl herself didn’t know the proportion of her mental harm and just one tiny bite of the spicy cracker was enough to make her go crazy. She was safe enough to taste it when Jun was away at work. However, some time later she regretted making that decision because after the so well-known flavor entered her taste buds, all the memories hit her like an earthquake and her mind shattered into the tiniest pieces, as if it was made of glass. She lost control of her body or mind, completely shutting herself out of the reality around her and some other entity took over. The different person inside her pushed the body on running and running, until it reached another town. It didn’t even have any purpose, other than the most important one, at least to the crazy being that it was at that moment. To destroy.
What people saw that day was not a girl who ran away from mental hospital or her pursuers, nor a girl who was just fine a while ago and now all of a sudden was crazy or not in her right mind. They didn’t see a girl. They didn’t see a human. What they saw was a monster at its finest. Eyes bloodshot red joined by a vicious smirk, with lips formed into a grin and teeth constantly chewing on the body’s own nails and flesh, giggling and laughing in a maniacal way as if it was all that mattered. Her hair was half onto her face, her clothes torn and dirty with blood stains all over them. Her identity was unknown due to the drastic change in her looks thus no one thought of her as of the princess, they just didn’t recognize her as a human being. No matter how many of the few braver people tried to approach her and negotiate with her, they were beaten badly and wounded to such extent that some were balancing on the verge of life or death. However, no one wanted to use a gun on the girl, even if she was a monster in their eyes.
Regardless of all that, there was one courageous person who saw through the monster and had an idea of a great misery that the girl could have been going through. She was one of the underrated doctors who used weird means and treatments to heal people, so her clientele was that of the low number. The woman stepped out from the crowd and used an arrow, whose sharp end was dipped in a sleeping drought. It was thin enough to not hurt the girl but strong enough to knock her out. The scary monster fell and the chaos stopped, that’s how other people saw it. The doctor simply took the girl into her house and treated her in best way possible. However, now that the girl was all cleaned up and calmly sleeping, something about her bothered the doctor greatly. Yokoyama Yui could have sworn she saw the girl’s face somewhere and it just bothered her to no end. Few days later, while going back from one of a few of her clients she saw a poster in one of the street boards and it hit her. The King and The Queen announced The Princess missing. The girl on the poster was Matsui Rena. That girl who Yui took care of, while others just wanted to get rid of her, was The Princess.
It was very important to be discreet about this matter. Yokoyama had to let The Royal Family know the girl was a live and well but it was dangerous for the news to get into the wrong hands, especially after what the doctor witnessed. That was the sole foundation for her decision to send the most trusted person in the world to The Palace to give the news directly to The King and The Quuen. There was a reason why Yui relied so heavily on Shimazaki Haruka. Not only were they lovers, best friends and coworkers – Haruka was her assistant; but also the quiet girl was the one who would never share a secret with anyone other than those in need. Even if tortured and threatened to be killed, she would still keep her mouth shut no matter what. If needed, she would take the secret to the grave. Why? Because Paruru – that’s how Yui called her precious lover – was a mute. She made her feelings and emotions known through expressions, and that was how the two communicated. In the town the girl was called Salty because she didn’t feel like sharing her expressions to anyone but Yokoyama, not that it bothered the two girls anyway.
While Shimazaki was away on her task, something happened that changed Yokoyama’s view of the girl in her house. A man visited her one day, claiming he knew the girl and he just wanted to see if she was well. At first the doctor didn’t want to believe his words, but when he retold the whole story of what he and the girl had been through, she let the man see the girl in bed. To both of their surprise, Rena was awake and confused of her whereabouts. She had no recollection of what she did that day, not even the tiniest memory and was slightly taken aback by Yui’s story. None of them knew that spicy crackers was the cause since Rena failed to remember anything from that fated morning or anything onwards. She did tell them she had vague memories of wanting to take revenge but how she got to the state, she was still clueless and oblivious. On the other hand, that made Jun realize the girl was still completely affected and in pain from what she had been through and when Rena went back to sleep, he consulted Yui about it.
The doctor agreed something had to be done, in some way the memories just had to be taken away. She told him about the girl’s real identity only at that point but assured they still had a few days before The Royal Family comes to take her back in. Jun suddenly knew that maybe taking Rena somewhere peaceful and quiet might trigger her memories to a slightly different level and he was determined to at least try. That was how the next day they both went for a walk and he took her to the uninhabited place in the forest that he found while traveling to find her. It was lavish, full with flowers, trees and serenity. Somehow, while being there, Rena realized she could feel those dirty hands all over her body and she couldn’t keep quiet about it anymore. She knew she was very young, however, she didn’t know if she was tainted or not. No matter what, she wanted the memories to be erased, if better, replaced by something more pleasant. The princess turned to Jun with determination in her eyes to ask for something embarrassing, but something very important to her. He had to make love to her, he had to change her memories. It had to be him and no one else.
Hearing gentle cooing just next to her ear she knew it was Jun waking her up. The princess lazily opened her eyelids, only to see his face right in front of her. She blushed, thinking back to her memory of that time when she asked him to take her memories away. Seeing his handsome features she couldn’t help but extend her hand and caress his cheek, her finger brushing his lips and feeling a sudden intake of breath reverberate through them. His slightly surprised expression soon turned into that of a hungry wolf and it made her heart beat like crazy. Yet it lasted only approximately a minute, and then Jun returned to being a proper butler he was. He retreated and pulled away the covers off of her, making Rena hug her naked self in embarrassment and excitement at the same time. It was a bright sunny morning and a pleasant bath time was awaiting her.