Letters (post-Muffin)

To: My silly princess

From: Kumi-chan

How have you been? D’you still have trouble falling asleep? Do you still watch that show you used to love? How’s the weather there?

Here it’s raining, and it’s inevitably making me miss those days we used to spend together in your apartment watching movies till late. D’you still remember? We made popcorn and even if you didn’t like the sweet ones that much, you still made the candy popcorn for me.
I clearly remember how foolish I looked because I wanted to eat popcorn without letting you go, ended up making a mess, pouting and upset for my failure and you laughed hard but still, I couldn’t let you go, so you ended up feedin me like a spoiled brat I was.

Something I never told you is that I didn’t really care about the movie, all I wanted is to have you in my arms. It also made me realize I acted differently depending on what kind of movie we were watching.

If it was an action movie, I always ended up thinking of what would I do to keep you by my side.

If it was a horror movie, even though I didn’t like them, they were the perfect excuse to get closer to you and besides, for me the most scary thing was losing you.

If it was a romantic movie, I usually lost myself remembering the first time we met. Do you remember? I was looking for Muffin who ran away and he guided me to you. Or the time you confessed to me when it was supposed to be me doing it first…

Comedy movie…. Do I have to remind you of all the silly stuff we used to do? I have to be honest, I love your laugh, your smile and how your eyes shine. So I didn’t care if I was a big fool as long as I could see that smile.

And drama … I’ll never forget the day I told you I was moving away….the sadness in your eyes and how I made you cry… I’m sorry about that.

All those movies we saw, I miss those days the most and now I’m on the other side of the world.

Anyway. How is your relationship with Manatsu? I bet it’s all going well. And I also bet that she’s falling hard for you. If you marry her, will you invite me to the wedding?? But maybe that’s to much to ask after I ran away.

I also wanted to apologize for my last visit to Japan, actually, to Nagoya. You know, for a second I forgot you were in a relationship, thank god a random phone call from my coworker stopped me from being stupid…or things could’ve went further to a point of no return..

It’s just that I missed you so much…

It’s late here now, so I should go sleep, tomorrow I have work.

I miss your gentle voice and that creepy but cute laughter, the way your eyes sparkle when you see your favorite food, or the way your skin feels against mine when we cuddle…

I should go.

Have a great day, Rena.

With love,

Kumi.


To: My silly princess

From: Kumi-chan

How are you? Were you dreaming of me today? Cuz I spent half of my day sneezing.

I got out of the office late and, what a surprise, is raining again. I’m walking back home, I’m lucky to live close by. Rain always reminds me of you, so I started playing under the rain as we used to, just alone and then I remembered THAT date.

D’you remember our first date? It was Sunday, both of us had the day off and decided to spend it together at the mall. I won’t ever forget that endless talk in that cute coffee shop. It still amazes me how we started talking about cakes and it went all the way from talking about that idol group you like so much, to that actor with great abs, going to global warming and your warm blanket, to my childhood teddy bear and the newest games, finally ending on me saying “anyway I prefer chocolate cake” hahaha it was too random but it was always so fun to talk to you.

After what it seemed like hours, we went to play at the arcade. I’m sorry I was so distracted by the games. but you know, I watched you pout whenever you didn’t get enough attention, it was so cute that I did it on purpose a few times.

That day, it started raining just like today, we were walking holding hands. I didn’t mind the rain, I was too happy to care about my wet shoes or the water soaking my hair. I was just smiling like a fool.

Have you forgotten our first kiss? It was that day. You know I don’t like PDA, but that day I couldn’t hold back anymore, you were just perfect under the rain. It was slow and I made sure to put all my love, I just wanted you to know that you were my only one. I just felt I needed no words as long as I could prove to you my love.

It’s funny.. Back then I was the quiet one and you would always speak your mind. It’s not that I had nothing to say, is just that I’m not good at speaking out my feelings, and that was the reason that drew us apart.

God, I’m so horrible at talking about my emotions that I couldn’t even tell you I was flying right away that night after our fight. I just said “I got a great job opportunity, I’m moving away”. I knew you wouldn’t stop me. Because even if you tried, you know me well, it would be useless, at the end I would just to things my way.

I’m not the type that talks about feelings because for me it’s confusing to understand it all and it scares me. But I guess at some point pouring my all into a kiss, a touch or a simple smile is not enough. You needed to hear it from my lips. I never quite understood that till now. After that time in my flat when we both said “I love you” to each other, not even once I repeated those words again, getting more and more scared of how they might affect me as a person. It took me going miles away and seeing you with someone else to understand the importance of talking it out.

I’m an idiot right? Missing you and remembering everything about you when I’m the one that walked away.

Are you eating well? I hope Manatsu treats you to melonpans or spicy curry rice. Then, are you sleeping eight hours a day? I never liked how hard you pushed yourself, so I hope you rest well.

I’m almost home, so I should end this letter here. I don’t know which number this letter is, still no answer, I guess Manatsu is treating you well…maybe too well.

Though I don’t mind if you don’t reply, I know you read them all, maybe more than once.

I miss you.

And yeah, I’m a fool for leaving you. But I still think it was the right thing to do.

Take care Rena, you will always be my favorite princess, the only one.

With love,

Kumi


To: Kumi-chan
From: My silly princess

Hey there, Kumi-chan 🙋

I am doing well, thank you ☺

I do have some issues with trying to fall asleep when I am alone, but I am still keeping the promise and getting the so much needed eight hours, well, sometimes seven, so no worries ✅

I am watching a different show now from last time, it has more mystery than the previous one and the cliffhangers are the best! ‼‼

The weather is nice, it feels finally like spring 😊

Rain always reminds me of you… I especially remember that one time when you were scared of thunder and ran from your floor to mine, knocked hastily on the door – thank heavens Jurina was out on a trip with Yui-chan – and when I opened it, I was blasted into a wall by a scared you. Then we ended up in my bed, me holding you in my arms and calming you down by singing random songs. I know it made you forget the storm 😏

I dream of you too much and you know that but my dream past night had nothing to do with you, I dreamt of intermingled families of my relatives and that was a bit creepy… I understood nothing of that dream and realized I would rather dream of you and wake up in pain because you are not in my arms anymore than have weird dreams that make no sense to me… 😔

I miss your kisses, those slow sensual ones, or when we suddenly kiss so passionately and wildly, that even Muffin used to run and hide in another room, I guess he also does not like PDA 😂

I miss you, I need you, I love you… I am dating Manatsu and I am happy, but you know you are always on my mind and I will never forget you 💖

You are MY fool, my baka Kumi-chan 😍

With lots of kisses,

Your Silly Princess 👸


To: My silly princess
From: Kumi-chan

Yea, I’m a fool.

You have no idea how happy I am right now, even my coworkers noticed the change after I read your letter! I wasn’t expecting anything honestly but I’m smiling like a fool since early morning.

Do you really had to remind me of that stormy day!? And my fear of thunders!!! Ahhh that was an embarrassing day because I’m sure the others saw me running like crazy to your apartment with Muffin going after me. And really, at that time I didn’t even care if your imouto was around or not! Though, honestly, the point here is, thunderstorms became my favorite after that day we were trapped inside my car.

Do you remember that night? The storm was heavy and we decided to wait till it slowed down, we talked about everything till that thunder hit close and of course I jumped on you. I have to be honest, it wasn’t only my fear of thunders, I wanted to hug you so badly, to have you close to me and I needed an excuse…. -specially after those dreams I never told you about-…. I got lost in your eyes and that kiss, slow at first and then, before we knew it, it became wild and I remember the change in your eyes, I desired you as much as you desired me. I don’t remember how exactly we ended up on the back seat but I do remember the taste of your skin, your soft lips, and the sound of your voice, that sensual sweet and sexy voice and I even remember the taste of you….

It was the perfect storm.

And again I’m remembering things I shouldn’t.

How is Muffin? I bet he hates mommy for leaving him behind. I couldn’t take him to The States, my building doesn’t allow pets and I have to admit that I’m lonely without him.

I’m lonely without you…

Guess what, I had lunch with my boss. We were talking about the next business trip and somehow, out of nowhere he asked if I had someone I missed back home….and I said yes…. We talked about Muffin, I miss that ball of fur.

You should stop dreaming of me! Is hard to work when all I do is sneeze!

Does Muffin still hide in another room when he sees PDA? I hope he is biting Manatsu’s leg. OK, I shouldn’t say that…I’m sorry, I know she is a nice girl and she takes care of you well…

I should go sleep now, it’s past my bedtime and my head hurts a little.

Don’t tease Manatsu too much and stop thinking about me. I don’t deserve it, not after what I did. So I’ll settle with being just your friend.

You don’t have any idea how much I want to say those three words…but I promised to myself I wouldn’t say them again…..

Ahhh maybe one last time…

Just three words…..

I…..am sleepy.

Have a great day Rena.

With love,

Kumi

-no title- (Nobunaga x Gekikara)

Matsui Rena has long forgotten her name or last name. No one has ever addressed her other than Gekikara for ten years now. Well, not that she really cared about it. Her sanity was far gone, glimmers of it only appeared with Ooshima Yuuko present. She missed her mentor greatly and the sorrow in her heart never went away. On the contrary, it turned into more viciousness and craziness, making Gekikara the most formidable fighter in the city. Other than Maeda Atsuko, that is. However, the so feared Yuuko-san’s successor was in jail for quite a few years, which wasn’t really such a bad thing, considering Takahashi-san frequently visited the Maji female in her cell. Whatever happened during those visits, no one knew, well, no proof was ever-present even if they did.

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D-7. Muffin

[A block of flats in a random street in Nagoya, not any different from any other apartment block. A building of twenty storeys, renovated and with a nice garden and parking lot next to it. Its inhabitants of course are a bit more interesting than your usual crowd, thus our story will be centered around them. Not all, but some particular floors and flats. First, let’s peak into their everyday lives, to get to know them.]

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Rekindle The Flame

A/n. Thanks to Misaki gurl for a perfect quote that made me have a title instantly xD this is so random guys but seriously, despite the certain tsundere being super mega tsundere, I still have faith in this ship… Just so you know, this is all a fantasy and I really hope Jurina is not having these depressing thoughts that I will write in here… Oh, and this story is obviously for Misaki, and really, for all those wMatsui shippers who, like Jaqueline said to me, felt like this ship was sinking faster than a Titanic… Well, let me bring you an Ice Age, so this ship can be pulled out of the water together with the whole iceberg that brought it down in the first place. Keep believing, folks!

*drops le story*

*runs away*

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SAKU-CHAN’S 48G BIAS RANKING. 2016 May

A/n. So last time I did this and was excited with the results. Now, a lot of people announced graduations/graduated since then and thus here is my updated ranking. I am not including the graduated ones or those who announced graduations. Let’s be fair this time, nee? This time the commentary will be not as long well unless the member was not talked about last time ^^; And the special mentions are done in no particular order, just so you know ^^

P.S. THIS IS SOLELY ENTIRELY MY OPINION. You do not have to agree with it, but please refrain from commenting negativity about the members.

(WARNING, LONG TEXT INCOMING. MIGHT not be AS LONG as last time.)

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Unspoken Feelings. Part 5

YuiYuu

A/n. Hello, dear readers~ Um, I know this update is way way WAYYYYYYYYY too late, nd I have no excuses, other than procrastination… I hope you guys enjoy this. This is a late Birthday present to Bunny, kinda ^^; I am just glad I was finally able to update this and cannot wait for the last part which will be very….HEATED.

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SAKU-CHAN’S 48G BIAS RANKING. 2016 January

A/n. This list was done BEFORE Umeda Ayaka announced officially her graduation. I am not removing her and not replacing her with anyone because I love her that much and honestly think she deserves mentioning. Obviously other graduates deserve that too, what with Ripopo, Mariyagi and Nakkii affecting me greatly, or 48G pillars such as Takamina and Sae affecting all of us and 48G. However, that is for another post on some of the graduates that I might make in the future. For now, have fun reading.

P.S. THIS IS SOLELY ENTIRELY MY OPINION. You do not have to agree with it, but please refrain from commenting negativity about the members.

(WARNING, LONG TEXT INCOMING.)

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My Kuchi Utsushi Butler. Chapter 5

KuchiUtsushi

A/n. Hello, guys~ So, as some of you probably know, AKBlasphemy48 got shut down. I just wanted to say thank you to Max for giving us opportunity to enjoy the freedom of posting and reading a fanfiction of no boundaries, for as long as it lasted.

Now, since this is something my fans probably love the most out of everything I posted there (aside from A.L.I.V.E. fanfic, which you can find on AKB Fanfics on JPH!P forum), I am re-posting this fanfic of mine, called My Kuchi Utsushi Butler, or MKUB for short. Hope you enjoy, re-enjoy and be patient while I work on the next update (which is Chapter 6 and a SMUT *grins*)

 WARNING. Contains genderbender, smut, might contain strong language.

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My Kuchi Utsushi Butler. Chapter 4

KuchiUtsushi

A/n. Hello, guys~ So, as some of you probably know, AKBlasphemy48 got shut down. I just wanted to say thank you to Max for giving us opportunity to enjoy the freedom of posting and reading a fanfiction of no boundaries, for as long as it lasted.

Now, since this is something my fans probably love the most out of everything I posted there (aside from A.L.I.V.E. fanfic, which you can find on AKB Fanfics on JPH!P forum), I am re-posting this fanfic of mine, called My Kuchi Utsushi Butler, or MKUB for short. Hope you enjoy, re-enjoy and be patient while I work on the next update (which is Chapter 6 and a SMUT *grins*)

P.S. THIS CHAPTER ACTUALLY CONTAINS VERY STRONG CONTENT, THUS IT IS ADVISED TO READ ONLY FOR THOSE WHO ARE 18+.

 WARNING. Contains genderbender, smut, might contain strong language.

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My Kuchi Utsushi Butler. Chapter 3

KuchiUtsushi

A/n. Hello, guys~ So, as some of you probably know, AKBlasphemy48 got shut down. I just wanted to say thank you to Max for giving us opportunity to enjoy the freedom of posting and reading a fanfiction of no boundaries, for as long as it lasted.

Now, since this is something my fans probably love the most out of everything I posted there (aside from A.L.I.V.E. fanfic, which you can find on AKB Fanfics on JPH!P forum), I am re-posting this fanfic of mine, called My Kuchi Utsushi Butler, or MKUB for short. Hope you enjoy, re-enjoy and be patient while I work on the next update (which is Chapter 6 and a SMUT *grins*)

 WARNING. Contains genderbender, smut, might contain strong language.

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My Kuchi Utsushi Butler. Chapter 2

KuchiUtsushi

A/n. Hello, guys~ So, as some of you probably know, AKBlasphemy48 got shut down. I just wanted to say thank you to Max for giving us opportunity to enjoy the freedom of posting and reading a fanfiction of no boundaries, for as long as it lasted.

Now, since this is something my fans probably love the most out of everything I posted there (aside from A.L.I.V.E. fanfic, which you can find on AKB Fanfics on JPH!P forum), I am re-posting this fanfic of mine, called My Kuchi Utsushi Butler, or MKUB for short. Hope you enjoy, re-enjoy and be patient while I work on the next update (which is Chapter 6 and a SMUT *grins*)

 WARNING. Contains genderbender, smut, might contain strong language.

Continue reading

My Kuchi Utsushi Butler. Chapter 1

KuchiUtsushi

A/n. Hello, guys~ So, as some of you probably know, AKBlasphemy48 got shut down. I just wanted to say thank you to Max for giving us opportunity to enjoy the freedom of posting and reading a fanfiction of no boundaries, for as long as it lasted.

Now, since this is something my fans probably love the most out of everything I posted there (aside from A.L.I.V.E. fanfic, which you can find on AKB Fanfics on JPH!P forum), I am re-posting this fanfic of mine, called My Kuchi Utsushi Butler, or MKUB for short. Hope you enjoy, re-enjoy and be patient while I work on the next update (which is Chapter 6 and a SMUT *grins*)

 WARNING. Contains genderbender, smut, might contain strong language.

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My Kuchi Utsushi Butler. Prologue

KuchiUtsushi

A/n. Hello, guys~ So, as some of you probably know, AKBlasphemy48 got shut down. I just wanted to say thank you to Max for giving us opportunity to enjoy the freedom of posting and reading a fanfiction of no boundaries, for as long as it lasted.

Now, since this is something my fans probably love the most out of everything I posted there (aside from A.L.I.V.E. fanfic, which you can find on AKB Fanfics on JPH!P forum), I am re-posting this fanfic of mine, called My Kuchi Utsushi Butler, or MKUB for short. Hope you enjoy, re-enjoy and be patient while I work on the next update (which is Chapter 6 and a SMUT *grins*)

 WARNING. Contains genderbender, smut, might contain strong language.

 

It was a strange request The Queen asked me. ‘Do not ever let her eat the spicy crackers.’ That was all she said. Everything else she left in my hands, to decide whether the princess needed things or not. Thus when I started working as her butler I slowly began to know her and I knew exactly what she needed. There was the only problem though. She cried every morning because she wanted to have a spicy cracker. The Queen prohibited me from giving her one and I tried my best to avoid her tears. But really, I just couldn’t watch her being in such a state. So I sneakily took a cracker once for her next to her breakfast. If only I knew what things it would bring… No, even if I knew what things it would bring, giving her the cracker, I’d still give her the cracker without the slightest doubt in me. It was what made me feel love and experience such things one would never be able to as a butler.

 

 

My Inspirations (Matsui Rena-sama graduation post)

Frankly speaking, I am very calm and relaxed today. On this day where tears are streaming freely in a form of waterfalls and rivers, I am as calm as one can be. Maybe slightly sad and somewhat lost as what the future brings, but still, relaxed. I have a smile on my face, despite the commotion around me. On this day, when someone moves forward and takes a turning point in their life, the one they always dreamed of… I can only smile and feel very proud to have followed them till the very end. However, this is not the end. This is just the beginning. Beginning of Matsui Rena. Not as an idol. As an actress.

I was always asking myself…what made me fall completely under her spell from day 1? I mean, now I know her thoughts, personality, goals, charms, voice, features, but then…the girl didn’t stand out much amidst other SKE48 members and really, most of the time she was behind others or in a shadow/corner… Yet I instantly fell in love. She has very beautiful eyes, they are sharp yet have such a weird feel to them, as if you can look deep into her soul through them. Her smile is so captivating and her energy goes off the roof. Then I didn’t care she is not as good at dancing, they all were just starting their journey as part of SKE48, but…something about her clicked within me.

Matsui Rena was, is and will always be my KamiOshi. Same with Ooshima Yuuko. And people probably don’t understand two things. Either they don’t get the whole idol thing and what’s so great about them, or they wonder how one can have more than one oshimen. Well, let me break it down to you.

When I got into AKB48, there were Team A and Team K only, and I instantly fell in love with Ooshima Yuuko. Since that day I never found anyone as charming and amazing and inspiring and hard working as her – not to say that others do not possess such qualities or do not work hard – she simply was ALL in ONE. Up till this day she is No.1 in my heart, despite not being an idol anymore. You ask about the term idol? I tell you it is a road, or more like a helping step for people to achieve their goals. You want to be an actress? Fine. You become idol, work hard, get known, then graduate and become an actress. Of course, it can go many different ways, but this is like a simplest example of it. When you are an idol, you do not just sing, dance or be cute. You get to act in various movies and dramas, you do variety, comedy, learn skits and MCing, you get to do handshake events, perform in theater, various concert halls and meet a lot of fans. It’s everything and even more. Photobooks, magazine shoots, DVDs, various collaborations, you name it.

And then the term KamiOshi, or oshimen. To me, KamiOshi and Oshimen are terms a bit different. KamiOshi means someone you admire that is of god/goddess level. Oshimen is simply someone you admire, your No.1. Yuuko-sama was always my KamiOshi, same goes for Rena-sama. And it will never change. They have a lot in common, that is what I realized when following all 48G. They both always aspired to be actresses since day 1, they always worked really hard, sometimes carrying the weight-load alone, they both didn’t graduate right away when they wanted, first they taught their juniors all they could and pushed them to front, making sure to leave 48G in younger CAPABLE generation’s hands. Inspirational for sure.

And the people that are now left in 48G, I have an oshimen who is as exceptionally awesome and wonderful as if she was the child of Yuuko-sama and Rena-sama. Yokoyama Yui. That girl is not to be reckoned with. I believe Takamina made a right choice picking Yuihime as the next Soukantoku and I am more than proud to have followed Yuihime since 9gen days. While writing this, I realized one thing. I always say how Watanabe Miyuki is on par with Yokoyama Yui in my rankings, but honestly speaking… It’s not quite so. Mirukii has the charm to mesmerize you and she is an amazing dancer, her voice is to die for and her personality is cheerful and she is hardworking – damn that’s a long sentence here… However, I realized Yuihime is above her in mostly all aspects. So I know now that Yuihime is officially my No.1 in 48G now that Rena-sama has graduated.

But as I was saying, Yuuko-sama and Rena-sama (and you could include Maeda Atsuko) are the ones that are above them all. I think I could talk the same way about Hello!Project C-ute’s Suzuki Airi, she is also somewhat like a child of Yuuko-sama and Rena-sama. But honestly, these idols inspire me to move forward with my life and do my best every day, no matter what obstacles come my way. If you think idols are nothing but cute girls who cannot dance or sing, you are very wrong. They are all round performers and I am more than happy to be a fan since the very beginning.

I wish all the best to Matsui Rena on her journey to become one of the best actresses. I do think she is one of the best if not the best – though I gotta give it to Yuuko-sama – actresses and I will continue supporting her no matter what. After all, she is my KamiOshi 🙂

The Attraction of The Mirror. Chapter 4

RenaKin-075A/n. Oh god, it’s been So Long! since I updated this story and good thing I know everything that needs to happen in it, so yeah, just had a mood to work on it :3

Hope you like this 🙂

Just a heads up, this chapter is from Rena’s POV, continuing from where we left her in Chapter 2

P.S. How many references to 48G related things will you find in this update~?

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Office Life. After Hours (YuiYuu SMUT)

A/n. Sakuchan finalLY had the amazing opportunity to do a collaboration with BUNNY~ Otherwise known as Skyle in here~ this piece of work is something I am really proud to present~

 

HUGE THANK YOU TO YUUSEI-KUN for proofreading this whole smutty work~ *kisses cheek* 

 

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Checkmate. Chapter D

A/n. So yeah, decided to toss away my laziness and fix this part. Did that, like always, with the help of Yuki-kun. Now I can concentrate on other things. When I have free time…. I’ll post the next chapter (need to finish writing it first… OTL ) Anyways, hope you enjoy this.

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